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Chuck Norris frisks airport security.
If Chuck Norris was the star of 24 the show would be called 1.
CBS hired Chuck Norris to replace Charlie Sheen, the show is now called 10 and a half men.
Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table because Chuck Norris only recognizes the element of surprise.
The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there. In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.
Chuck Norris once ate a whole cake before his friends could tell him there was a stripper in it.
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Licensed to kill time.
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