[nyctoytimer]

He sits down at the counter and starts getting himself really good and drunk. Like, properly pissed. After a while, he feels a certain heaviness in his colon, so he calls over the bartender.

"'Scuse me," he asks blearily. "Where's the bathroom?"

"Oh, it's right down the hall!" the bartender replies. "Just take two lefts and a right, and you'll be right there."

So, the drunkard stumbles along, and lo and behold, he discovers a golden toilet. He's pretty impressed, but in his current state, he cares more about relieving himself, so he takes a shit and leaves for the night.

The next night, the man returns to the bar. After an ill-advised series of alcoholic beverages, he finds he needs to go to the restroom again, and he can't remember where it is.

"Could ya tell me, where's the bathroom?" he asks the bartender.

"Right down the hall, just take two lefts and a right!" the bartender says.

And so, the drunk man discovers the golden toilet once again, relieves himself, and leaves to go home.

The third night's going just like the last two, but when the man goes down the hall, he finds the golden toilet's vanished. He hurries back to the bar.

"Wha's happened to the golden toilet?" he asks the bartender. "I swear, it was right there!"

The bartender sizes the man up. You can almost hear the puzzle pieces clicking together in his head. Then, he turns and shouts down the length of the bar:

"Hey, Dave! I found the guy who's been shitting in the tuba!"