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Yeah my vote would be that 41 mm is too big for your wrist. Also, the idea of wearing watches way down on the back of your hand rather than your wrist is baffling to me. You should be able to bend your wrist freely without any obstruction, without the watch digging into your hand.
I completely agree that an AP should have some boldness on the wrist and I think that a 38 or 39 will be great on you.
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