Originally Posted by Slculve
Ok. Just one more. Not a movie though. I think you all will get it. And I love the Sierra Madre one. Love that movie! Ok...I hope you like this one.
Four weeks and six days ago my, now, ex-husband brought home to this house a new Rolex Explorer II in SS with white dial, stamped from 904L solid steel, and on an Oyster bracelet with the Easylink clasp so that all men can be fitted equal.
Now we are engaged in a great ex-spousal war, testing whether our union, or any matrimonial union, so conceived and so dedicated, can be expected to long endure such purchase. We are met on a great battlefield of that marriage. We had agreed to dedicate a portion of our income, as to avoid strife, for those purchases that were absolutely needed so that we could live our lives debt free so that our heirs here might live better than we. It is altogether fitting and proper that we should have done this.
But, in a larger sense, I could not tolerate, I could not accept, I could not allow this to stand. The poor souls, living and dead, who had struggled to tell their mates of their uh-approved exorbitant purchases, had consecrated it, far above my now poor families ability to add or detract. The neighborhood will little note, nor long remember why I divorced him, but it will never forget that I tossed his sorry butt out on a cold night in his tighty whities. It is for us the sane, rather, to be rational here to the unfinished work of trying to return an 'almost' NIB Rolex and to fight to re-sticker all those little bitty pieces of plastic so plentifully attached and hard to find until weeks later back on. It is rather for us to be here dedicated to that great task remaining before us—that from these dishonored Rolex junkies we take increased devotion to that cause for which they gave the last full measure of marriage devotion—that we here highly resolve that these idiots shall not have been been divorced in vain—that this wife, under God, shall have a new husband—and that the checkbook of the family, by the family, for the family, shall, going forward, require two signatures.
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