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peatnick · 5 December 2014, 10:35 PM

A mature lady gets pulls over for speeding

Older Woman: Is there a problem, Officer?

Traffic Cop: Yes ma'am, I'm afraid you were speeding.

Older Woman: Oh, I see.

Traffic Cop: Can I see your license please?

Older Woman: Well, I would give it to you but I don't have one.

Traffic Cop: Don't have one?

Older Woman: No. I lost it 4 years ago for drunk driving.

Traffic Cop: I see...Can I see your vehicle registration papers please.

Older Woman: I can't do that.

Traffic Cop: Why not?

Older Woman: I stole this car.

Traffic Cop: Stole it?

Older Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner

Traffic Cop: You what!?

Older Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see it.

The traffic cop looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car while calling for back up.

Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun.

Officer 2: Ma'am, could you step out of your vehicle please! The woman steps out of her vehicle.

Older woman: Is there a problem sir?

Officer 2: My colleague here tells me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner.

Older Woman: Murdered the owner? Are you serious?

Officer 2: Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car, please.

The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk.

Officer 2: Is this your car, ma'am?

Older Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers. The traffic cop is quite stunned.

Officer 2: My colleague claims that you do not have a driving license.

The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer.

The officer examines the license quizzically.

Officer 2: Thank you ma'am, but I am puzzled, as I was told by my officer here that you didn't have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner!

Older Woman: Bet the lying bastard told you I was speeding, too.

cop414 · 5 December 2014, 10:51 PM

MonBK · 5 December 2014, 10:56 PM

Good one..:)

Deanwillie · 5 December 2014, 11:19 PM

Haha

Psmith · 5 December 2014, 11:22 PM

seand442 · 7 December 2014, 07:25 AM

A classic.

Frosty · 7 December 2014, 07:40 AM

vitalsignsrn · 7 December 2014, 11:06 AM

Hairdude1 · 8 December 2014, 09:03 AM

locutus49 · 8 December 2014, 09:06 AM

Excellent.

Bangel · 10 December 2014, 08:29 PM

linesiders · 11 December 2014, 11:06 AM

Bisquitlips · 12 December 2014, 12:55 PM

wdin · 26 December 2014, 01:34 PM

this is so good!!!! hahahahahaha!

subtona · 26 December 2014, 01:52 PM

Hahaha

5 December 2014, 10:35 PM	#1
peatnick Banned Join Date: Apr 2014 Location: USA Posts: 40	fast girl A mature lady gets pulls over for speeding Older Woman: Is there a problem, Officer? Traffic Cop: Yes ma'am, I'm afraid you were speeding. Older Woman: Oh, I see. Traffic Cop: Can I see your license please? Older Woman: Well, I would give it to you but I don't have one. Traffic Cop: Don't have one? Older Woman: No. I lost it 4 years ago for drunk driving. Traffic Cop: I see...Can I see your vehicle registration papers please. Older Woman: I can't do that. Traffic Cop: Why not? Older Woman: I stole this car. Traffic Cop: Stole it? Older Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner Traffic Cop: You what!? Older Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see it. The traffic cop looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car while calling for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun. Officer 2: Ma'am, could you step out of your vehicle please! The woman steps out of her vehicle. Older woman: Is there a problem sir? Officer 2: My colleague here tells me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner. Older Woman: Murdered the owner? Are you serious? Officer 2: Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car, please. The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk. Officer 2: Is this your car, ma'am? Older Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers. The traffic cop is quite stunned. Officer 2: My colleague claims that you do not have a driving license. The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer. The officer examines the license quizzically. Officer 2: Thank you ma'am, but I am puzzled, as I was told by my officer here that you didn't have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner! Older Woman: Bet the lying bastard told you I was speeding, too.

5 December 2014, 10:51 PM	#2
cop414 TRF Moderator & 2024 DATE-JUST41 Patron Join Date: Apr 2012 Real Name: Tim Location: Pennsylvania Watch: 14060M Posts: 71,864	__________________ Rolex Submariner 14060M Omega Seamaster 2254.50 DOXA Professional 1200T Card carrying member of TRF's Global Association of Retro-Grouch-Curmudgeons TRF's "After Dark" Bar & NightClub Patron P Club Member #17 2 FA ENABLED

5 December 2014, 11:22 PM	#5
Psmith "TRF" Member Join Date: Sep 2008 Real Name: Clive Location: Exoplanet Watch: spring-driven Posts: 38,856	__________________

7 December 2014, 07:25 AM	#6
seand442 "TRF" Member Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: Earth Watch: 116610 Posts: 3,455	A classic. __________________ NEVER ARGUE WITH AN IDIOT. FIRST THEY WILL DRAG YOU DOWN TO THEIR LEVEL. THEN, THEY WILL BEAT YOU WITH EXPERIENCE.

7 December 2014, 07:40 AM	#7
Frosty "TRF" Member Join Date: May 2009 Real Name: Larry Location: So Cal Watch: Rolex GMT 1675 Posts: 5,084	__________________ “Anyone can be sarcastic; it takes intelligence to solve a problem!”

5 December 2014, 10:56 PM	#3
MonBK Banned Join Date: Nov 2010 Location: Kingstown Posts: 58,280	Good one..:)

5 December 2014, 11:19 PM	#4
Deanwillie "TRF" Member Join Date: Jan 2013 Real Name: Dean Location: Miami Watch: Submariner 14060 Posts: 69	Haha

7 December 2014, 11:06 AM	#8
vitalsignsrn "TRF" Member Join Date: Jul 2013 Real Name: Judy Location: Ontario Watch: 116234 - 14060M Posts: 4,607

8 December 2014, 09:03 AM	#9
Hairdude1 "TRF" Member Join Date: Apr 2012 Real Name: Alex Location: Chicago Watch: AP,PP, Rolex Posts: 37,156	__________________ Instagram: @Hairdude Watches in Collection 5070R, 5522A, 214270 MK1, 228238 16750, 26401, 5711, 116718, 116710LN, 116300, 16710"Coke", 372, 15300, 15703 (All Flipped) Official Member "Perpetual 30" Las Vegas GTG 2016 Official Member "WIS-CON" Las Vegas International GTG 2017 Official Member 'WIS-CON' Las Vegas Int'l GTG 2018

8 December 2014, 09:06 AM	#10
locutus49 Banned Join Date: May 2014 Real Name: John Location: La Jolla, CA Watch: Platona Posts: 12,194	Excellent.

10 December 2014, 08:29 PM	#11
Bangel "TRF" Member Join Date: Oct 2011 Location: Australia Watch: 116610LN Posts: 15,802

11 December 2014, 11:06 AM	#12
linesiders 2024 ROLEX DATEJUST41 Pledge Member Join Date: Dec 2011 Location: RedSox Nation Watch: U Talkn Bout Wilis Posts: 5,442	__________________ I'm a sailor peg. And I've lost my leg. Climbing up the top sails. I've lost my leg!

12 December 2014, 12:55 PM	#13
Bisquitlips 2024 Pledge Member Join Date: Sep 2008 Real Name: Richard Location: USA Watch: YM Deep Space Posts: 12,506	__________________ Rolex Yacht-Master 40mm (SS-YG / Deep Space MOP) 16623 Breitling Aerospace Titanium / 18K with UTC. Omega Speedmaster 3510.50 Oris TT1 Pro Diver Regulator 43MM

26 December 2014, 01:34 PM	#14
wdin "TRF" Member Join Date: Dec 2013 Location: N/A Posts: 679	this is so good!!!! hahahahahaha!

26 December 2014, 01:52 PM	#15
subtona "TRF" Member Join Date: Jan 2011 Real Name: gus Location: East Coast Watch: APK & sometimes Y Posts: 26,054	Hahaha

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