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Warnsboy · 9 September 2010, 12:56 AM

Walmart Doctor......

One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Joe says to Mike behind him, "My elbow hurts like hell. I guess I'd better see a doctor."

"Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money," Mike replies

"There's a diagnostic computer down at WalMart. Just give it a urine sample and the computer will tell you what's wrong and what to do about it.

It takes ten seconds and costs ten dollars - A lot cheaper than a doctor."

So, Joe deposits a urine sample in a small jar and takes it to WalMart.

He deposits ten dollars and the computer lights up and asks for the urine sample.. He pours the sample into the slot and waits.

Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a printout:

"You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavy activity.. It will improve in two weeks. Thank you for shopping @ Wal-Mart.."

That evening, while thinking how amazing this new technology was, Joe began wondering if the computer could be fooled.

He mixed some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples from his wife and daughter, and a sperm sample from himself for good measure.

Joe hurries back to Wal-Mart, eager to check the results.. He deposits ten dollars, pours in his concoction, and awaits the results .

The computer prints the following:

1. Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. (Aisle 9)
2. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo. (Aisle 7)
3. Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab.
4. Your wife is pregnant. Twins. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer.
5. If you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never get better!

Thank you for shopping @ Walmart !

Dr. Robert · 9 September 2010, 01:07 AM

Art 1 · 9 September 2010, 05:55 AM

sleddog · 9 September 2010, 09:50 AM

Classic!

blackmsport · 9 September 2010, 01:07 PM

ho ho ho

DCgator · 9 September 2010, 01:28 PM

bwah ha ha hah

Chipmunk · 9 September 2010, 02:22 PM

JJ Irani · 9 September 2010, 04:16 PM

9 September 2010, 12:56 AM	#1
Warnsboy "TRF" Member Join Date: Oct 2009 Real Name: Michael Location: Midwest-USA Watch: 5513 Posts: 1,942	Walmart Doctor Walmart Doctor...... One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Joe says to Mike behind him, "My elbow hurts like hell. I guess I'd better see a doctor." "Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money," Mike replies "There's a diagnostic computer down at WalMart. Just give it a urine sample and the computer will tell you what's wrong and what to do about it. It takes ten seconds and costs ten dollars - A lot cheaper than a doctor." So, Joe deposits a urine sample in a small jar and takes it to WalMart. He deposits ten dollars and the computer lights up and asks for the urine sample.. He pours the sample into the slot and waits. Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a printout: "You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavy activity.. It will improve in two weeks. Thank you for shopping @ Wal-Mart.." That evening, while thinking how amazing this new technology was, Joe began wondering if the computer could be fooled. He mixed some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples from his wife and daughter, and a sperm sample from himself for good measure. Joe hurries back to Wal-Mart, eager to check the results.. He deposits ten dollars, pours in his concoction, and awaits the results . The computer prints the following: 1. Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. (Aisle 9) 2. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo. (Aisle 7) 3. Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab. 4. Your wife is pregnant. Twins. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer. 5. If you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never get better! Thank you for shopping @ Walmart !

9 September 2010, 01:07 AM	#2
Dr. Robert 2024 ROLEX DATEJUST41 Pledge Member Join Date: Dec 2009 Real Name: Bob Location: U.S.A. Watch: 1655 Posts: 61,530	__________________ Founder & Card Carrying Member of the Global Association of Retro-Grouch-Curmudgeons

9 September 2010, 09:50 AM	#4
sleddog TRF Moderator & 2024 DATE-JUST41 Patron Join Date: Jul 2007 Real Name: Rob Location: Nearby. Posts: 24,906	Classic! __________________ He who wears a Rolex is always on time, even when late!! TRF's "After Dark" Bar & Nightclub Patron-Founding Member..

9 September 2010, 02:22 PM	#7
Chipmunk "TRF" Member Join Date: Feb 2010 Real Name: Alvin Location: So Cal Watch: ROLEXES Posts: 5,390	__________________ "A thing of beauty is a joy forever"............John Keats

9 September 2010, 04:16 PM	#8
JJ Irani Fondly Remembered Join Date: May 2005 Real Name: JJ Location: Auckland, NZ Watch: ALL SOLD!! Posts: 74,320	__________________ Words fail me in expressing my utmost thanks to ALL of you for this wonderful support during my hour of need!! I firmly believe that my time on planet earth is NOT yet up!! I shall fight this to the very end.......and WIN!!

9 September 2010, 05:55 AM	#3
Art 1 Banned Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Florida, Canada Watch: Rol/Seik/Tud/Omega Posts: 30,244

9 September 2010, 01:07 PM	#5
blackmsport Banned Join Date: May 2009 Location: Melb - Australia Posts: 2,959	ho ho ho

9 September 2010, 01:28 PM	#6
DCgator "TRF" Member Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: PNW Watch: DS,BLNR,SubLV,DJ2 Posts: 8,123	bwah ha ha hah

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