Online Dating

[tyler1980]

Originally Posted by Ruud Van Driver

Not sure I'd go down the on-line dating route if I was single. Sometimes these things just happen when you least expect them. I met Mrs Van D at Heathrow airport over 19 years ago; I was travelling and she was working. Quite a bizarre story insofar as I had to take a short hop over to Belfast; the flights out of the airport that serve my home city were all full. Next closest airports (Bristol and Birmingham) also all full so the only option was for me to travel almost as far in the opposite direction to London and get on a flight there. As for her, she wanted to take a day's leave, which was denied on the basis of short staff. She requested to work in Internationals but was given Domestics instead. She also should have been on her break at the time of my flight but was asked to work my flight first. To this day, other staff still approach her and ask "are you the one that married a passenger?"

Only advice I can offer is to be safe, use your head and follow your gut.

Good luck

you have to take into consideration that women dont like to be hit on all day long. Its less socially acceptable now for men to do and i guess for good reason because a lot of times it is creepy. Ive heard stories from my wife where it happens constantly and to the point of being annoying/offensive.... and she is clearly married. Doesn't matter to them.

Its not just a "conversation" the motivation is to get a date. Just because one party is receptive to trying doesn't mean the other party is

So walking up to random women and talking to them isn't always a good idea.

I guarantee if there is a beautiful women sitting by herself at a starbucks and you walk up and say something you are not the first person to do that in the 10 minutes she has been sitting there. She just wants a cup of coffee.

[037]

Originally Posted by Headshrinker

I enjoyed the fork jokes, but seriously, that gesture may have saved my neighbor from a difficult situation. The investigator found the phone numbers did not match the man’s name or address (Manhattan) he had given. I still think “The Forks” were genius when you are only texting a potential date; he may have still been a serial killer, but you will know it’s the right one! I believe my friend should invest in a well-respected dating service if that’s the route she chooses to go for love.
If I lost my wife, I’d just stick to my hobbies and my children. Too much drama for me to handle!

Absolutely. The guy got forked by his own doing, which was the appropriate outcome.

I had a similar experience quite some time ago and did my own investigation—back when the Internet wasn't the data encyclopedia of today. The girl didn't match her photo by a solid 100 lbs, didn't live where she said and wasn't at all the person who I thought. Sadly, we had excellent phone calls and had a fair bit in common. But, if you start out lying like that then it'll never work. There's just no coming back from a false start.

That was a long time ago. I haven't tried it since.

[gabrielnovar]

online dating is the best invention to man. As long as you aren't a socially akward person and have a decent bank roll sky is the limit.

I fire up tinder put myself in any city load up the matches .

its almost as if meeting someone in person now is odd.

[tyler1980]

Originally Posted by gabrielnovar

online dating is the best invention to man. As long as you aren't a socially akward person and have a decent bank roll sky is the limit.

I fire up tinder put myself in any city load up the matches .

its almost as if meeting someone in person now is odd.

this sounds like an advertisement for penicillin

[Ruud Van Driver]

Originally Posted by tyler1980

you have to take into consideration that women dont like to be hit on all day long. Its less socially acceptable now for men to do and i guess for good reason because a lot of times it is creepy. Ive heard stories from my wife where it happens constantly and to the point of being annoying/offensive.... and she is clearly married. Doesn't matter to them.

Its not just a "conversation" the motivation is to get a date. Just because one party is receptive to trying doesn't mean the other party is

So walking up to random women and talking to them isn't always a good idea.

I guarantee if there is a beautiful women sitting by herself at a starbucks and you walk up and say something you are not the first person to do that in the 10 minutes she has been sitting there. She just wants a cup of coffee.

I think you've missed my point, Ty, but it's not important anyway.

I'm not suggesting that someone should go hitting on the persons of their desire all day long. I was not long out of a relationship I choose to forget; the last thing I wanted was to hook up with someone and boom, it just happened.

If I had my time over again, that's the way I would prefer it to happen. Chance encounters are exciting; trawling the internet to find Miss/Mr Right (or whatever) would not interest me. It might if I was a teenager with raging hormones but then I'd more likely be looking for Miss Right-Now.

Maybe it's because I find that social media is too much these days. The amount of times I stray into an establishment and see friends, families, whatever, sat around a table for dinner, coffee, etc. and they're all on their bloody phones instead of engaging with each other. No wonder half the people under 30 these days can't talk properly and say dumbass words like "obvs" and "awks".

I once saw a film with Bruce Willis, can't remember the title, and it was him and his wife hooking up to machines and living in a virtual world, something like Matrix. It horrified me. Seems to me that things like social media and online dating are pushing us towards something frighteningly similar.

Anyhoo, I ain't judging. To each his/her own

[Seekthefinest]

Met my wife in Boston on Match.com 14 years ago... Two kids and one Rolex later its worked out pretty well...

[tyler1980]

Originally Posted by Ruud Van Driver

I think you've missed my point, Ty, but it's not important anyway.

I'm not suggesting that someone should go hitting on the persons of their desire all day long. I was not long out of a relationship I choose to forget; the last thing I wanted was to hook up with someone and boom, it just happened.

If I had my time over again, that's the way I would prefer it to happen. Chance encounters are exciting; trawling the internet to find Miss/Mr Right (or whatever) would not interest me. It might if I was a teenager with raging hormones but then I'd more likely be looking for Miss Right-Now.

Maybe it's because I find that social media is too much these days. The amount of times I stray into an establishment and see friends, families, whatever, sat around a table for dinner, coffee, etc. and they're all on their bloody phones instead of engaging with each other. No wonder half the people under 30 these days can't talk properly and say dumbass words like "obvs" and "awks".

I once saw a film with Bruce Willis, can't remember the title, and it was him and his wife hooking up to machines and living in a virtual world, something like Matrix. It horrified me. Seems to me that things like social media and online dating are pushing us towards something frighteningly similar.

Anyhoo, I ain't judging. To each his/her own

no I'm just saying I personally wouldn't do the same things i did when dating 15 years ago any more with approaching people i didn't know randomly. Its a different time and you have to balance the fact you want a date with the fact the person may not want to be asked. However you dont know until you ask if you upset them. Its both good that we need to take that into consideration and confusing at the same time these days.

At least with online you know someone wants you to approach them or they wouldn't be using the service. then you decide to meet IRL

[DLRIDES]

Originally Posted by gabrielnovar

online dating is the best invention to man.

I’ll agree with that statement. Home delivery for the soul !

[Laszlo]

I’m the worst dater regardless of how. Just suck at it. Never formed a relationship from a date. Ever.

[Ruud Van Driver]

Originally Posted by tyler1980

no I'm just saying I personally wouldn't do the same things i did when dating 15 years ago any more with approaching people i didn't know randomly. Its a different time and you have to balance the fact you want a date with the fact the person may not want to be asked. However you dont know until you ask if you upset them. Its both good that we need to take that into consideration and confusing at the same time these days.

At least with online you know someone wants you to approach them or they wouldn't be using the service. then you decide to meet IRL

Ah, fair enough. Some good points, too; maybe I'd be of a different mindset if I had to go down that road in these times.

[Cravings7]

Originally Posted by Laszlo

I’m the worst dater regardless of how. Just suck at it. Never formed a relationship from a date. Ever.

How do you form one then?

[CamSLC]

I don't have personal experience, but I know a lot of people who have started great relationship and friendships using it. And just as many horror stories. It is the wave of the future.

[BBL]

Originally Posted by Cravings7

How do you form one then?

... You would have to know him................................... to know.

[BBL]

Originally Posted by Ruud Van Driver

Not sure I'd go down the on-line dating route if I was single. Sometimes these things just happen when you least expect them. I met Mrs Van D at Heathrow airport over 19 years ago; I was travelling and she was working. Quite a bizarre story insofar as I had to take a short hop over to Belfast; the flights out of the airport that serve my home city were all full. Next closest airports (Bristol and Birmingham) also all full so the only option was for me to travel almost as far in the opposite direction to London and get on a flight there. As for her, she wanted to take a day's leave, which was denied on the basis of short staff. She requested to work in Internationals but was given Domestics instead. She also should have been on her break at the time of my flight but was asked to work my flight first. To this day, other staff still approach her and ask "are you the one that married a passenger?"

Only advice I can offer is to be safe, use your head and follow your gut.

Good luck

Hey Ruud ... I love your story..... meant to be. Definitely arranged by a 'higher' power!

I have one similar.

Blessings! DM

[Laszlo]

Originally Posted by Cravings7

How do you form one then?

They just form by themselves. But waiting for them to form takes patience. Had some very long dry spells in my life.

[Omnibus]

I used to get to know girls from mIRC chatrooms 20 years or so ago ... long before online dating web or apps got in the hype. After a while it wasn't challenging anymore.

Finally I met my wife at a perfume shop we were both customers where I directly asked to get to know and offered if she'd like coffee time. Feared for a rejection for sure but heck she's my type, now or never kind of situation.

[Star Ferry]

Originally Posted by tyler1980

no I'm just saying I personally wouldn't do the same things i did when dating 15 years ago any more with approaching people i didn't know randomly. Its a different time and you have to balance the fact you want a date with the fact the person may not want to be asked. However you dont know until you ask if you upset them. Its both good that we need to take that into consideration and confusing at the same time these days.

At least with online you know someone wants you to approach them or they wouldn't be using the service. then you decide to meet IRL

I wouldn't hit on a woman at a workplace these days. But I'd hit on a stranger or a friend of a friend. Yes, she might feel uncomfortable, but it works like 25% of the time for me. I don't make rude or lascivious comments. Should someone just take what they can get online, for the sake of never making women upset?

[dkg1616]

Originally Posted by tyler1980

this sounds like an advertisement for penicillin

lol Tyler you crack me up!!!

[mbalmz]

met my fiancee on hinge 3 years ago and met my previous girlfriend of ~2 years on tinder. lots of first and a few second dates through those and similar apps before and in between.

[Cravings7]

Originally Posted by Laszlo

They just form by themselves. But waiting for them to form takes patience. Had some very long dry spells in my life.

Ooh... Taking what life throws at you selectively. That is something

[Yoda_Eating_Pizza]

Originally Posted by mbalmz

met my fiancee on hinge 3 years ago and met my previous girlfriend of ~2 years on tinder. lots of first and a few second dates through those and similar apps before and in between.

At first I thought you said you met your fiancee unhinged.

[tyler1980]

Originally Posted by Star Ferry

I wouldn't hit on a woman at a workplace these days. But I'd hit on a stranger or a friend of a friend. Yes, she might feel uncomfortable, but it works like 25% of the time for me. I don't make rude or lascivious comments. Should someone just take what they can get online, for the sake of never making women upset?

almost everyone i know has done or currently does online dating ... so i dont think its "take what you can get". Its probably the opposite, you have the chance to connect with people you never ever would have come across doing your normal daily routine. IMO that's a positive.

Its funny, even in London I run into the same strangers every day. I recognize the same people on the bus, trains etc every morning. We are creatures of habit and even in a giant city you still see the same people over and over as they are also commuting at the same time every day too. If you are single clearly you need to get out of your current bubble of interactions and its surprisingly hard to do.

My point on approaching random women IRL was simply that yes, i dont want to offend anyone and yes you need to take into account that someone may not want to be approached and its not always obvious until after you do it. By your own statistics you could deduce that 75% of the time you are doing something unwanted to someone else. I just think if there is a better way, why not? If she feels uncomfortable, yes it should be a consideration and not an afterthought.

Im not saying never talk to anyone. Just pointing out that over the course of a day women get approached multiple times and by multiple men that they dont know. From their perspective it can be scary or uncomfortable.

[superdog]

If you are a single dude, and you want to meet women, start going to yoga classes.

Best advice I could ever give anyone.

[rolexpatek363]

Originally Posted by Ruud Van Driver

The amount of times I stray into an establishment and see friends, families, whatever, sat around a table for dinner, coffee, etc. and they're all on their bloody phones instead of engaging with each other.

This is why I have a 10+ year old Nokia "dumbphone". No Facebook, etc. Smartphones ruin your life, and they can spy on you, as well.

[Star Ferry]

Originally Posted by tyler1980

almost everyone i know has done or currently does online dating ... so i dont think its "take what you can get". Its probably the opposite, you have the chance to connect with people you never ever would have come across doing your normal daily routine. IMO that's a positive.

Its funny, even in London I run into the same strangers every day. I recognize the same people on the bus, trains etc every morning. We are creatures of habit and even in a giant city you still see the same people over and over as they are also commuting at the same time every day too. If you are single clearly you need to get out of your current bubble of interactions and its surprisingly hard to do.

My point on approaching random women IRL was simply that yes, i dont want to offend anyone and yes you need to take into account that someone may not want to be approached and its not always obvious until after you do it. By your own statistics you could deduce that 75% of the time you are doing something unwanted to someone else. I just think if there is a better way, why not? If she feels uncomfortable, yes it should be a consideration and not an afterthought.

Im not saying never talk to anyone. Just pointing out that over the course of a day women get approached multiple times and by multiple men that they dont know. From their perspective it can be scary or uncomfortable.

declining to reciprocate the interest doesn't mean it was unwanted. some may genuinely enjoy the attention, or the interaction itself, but for another reason don't reciprocate. e.g., they are in a relationship, or they like talking to me but don't feel romantically attracted

I crush online dating 2 of the apps even gave me free paid subscriptions due to my profile's track record. But women get so many matches and receive so much attention that they end up becoming extremely picky.

The women I approach in real life are almost uniformly more attractive. The last time I dated a girl from an app who was very good looking and turned heads, by date 3 she was asking my net worth and ranting about how she always gets dumped (spoiler alert: it's her fault)

As I recall, you are a very tall ex-athlete with a lucrative City job in finance. But based on what I've read, most men on dating apps get virtually no matches. As someone who gets more matches than probably 99% of men my age, I still get no more matches than an ordinary woman who enjoys boozy brunches and has an elephant photo from Chiang Mai.

[SN13]

Originally Posted by Laszlo

They just form by themselves. But waiting for them to form takes patience. Had some very long dry spells in my life.

Your watch choices make sense now: Date & No Date.

[mbalmz]

Originally Posted by Yoda_Eating_Pizza

At first I thought you said you met your fiancee unhinged.

hah! she reads my posts on here sometimes so she was very much the correct amount of hinged.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[RolexWearinSonOfAGun]

Originally Posted by superdog

If you are a single dude, and you want to meet women, start going to yoga classes.

Best advice I could ever give anyone.

I second this. Total game-changer.

[tudorbaja27]

Originally Posted by RolexWearinSonOfAGun

I second this. Total game-changer.

Oh God..

[Headshrinker]

I have to update my story: The picture used by the man catfishing was obtained by us by using Google Image, an app that can search the internet for any duplicate images on the internet. The picture this guy used was that of a married gay man in Arizona that had lots of pictures of on Instagram. Be careful out there guys and gals.