Evening Classes.

[padi56]

Occasionally, probably much to the amusement of most of you lot, I find myself attending a little yoga class in the adjoining village. Perhaps once or twice a month, weather and body permitting. I'm not into alternative medicine or such like, but I do find it deeply relaxing and one of the few occasions I actually force anything remotely physical on my patently now unfit body. I enjoy it, plain and simple.

It's also rather good for checking out some of the local Lycra clad ladies on a regular basis. Fortunately, at least half of the assembled are of an age to be physically alluring still, that is between the ages of 18 and 60. Actually, truth be told most are between 30 - 50, but are still of a sound body if not mind. It's a welcome distraction whilst sitting there trying to get a foot behind my ear - my foot that is, unfortunately.

All in all, it makes for a pleasurable way in which to pass an hour an a half on an otherwise dull Wednesday evening. Trouble is, I don't know if I can go anymore, and my other half is certainly less than inclined to accompany me any more (she being included in the more desirable half of the group.)

You see, it's all very well being told to relax, but the effect that has when subsequently trying to achieve the aforementioned foot/ear interface is not a very desirable one. Imagine, for a moment if you will....

You're sitting in the cross legged position, with the bulk of your weight on one buttock, in this instance the left one. You have your right foot in your hand trying, unsuccessfully to pull it higher than neck level and closer than 8" from in front of your face. You have to get it into the 'answering the phone' position. It's getting a bit closer with each outward breath as you learn to relax a bit more and stretch the burning muscles in your thigh and back. A little closer, you think you might just manage to do it this time, for the first time in months of trying.



And then you crack one off.


And not just a little parp, oh no. This was a full blown machine gun rattle of almost ear shattering proportions that any self respecting guy down the pub would be proud of.

And it stank

What a embarrassment.

Not sure when I'll be returning again but it brought a few smiles
to several faces.

[Earl]

OMG padi!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! you didn't? you did? OMG that is so funny ;o)

So, tell me after the after mentioned expulsion of air from your bowels were you able to surpass the 8" and reach the telephone to the ear position?

[padi56]

Originally Posted by Earl

OMG padi!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! you didn't? you did? OMG that is so funny ;o)

So, tell me after the after mentioned expulsion of air from your bowels were you able to surpass the 8" and reach the telephone to the ear position?

Well to be truthful Earl the look on the wifes face,nearly turned me to stone And when the rest started laughing,and I too collapsed on the floor in embarrassment.All I wanted to do is get in the gents a bit quick,just to check for any mishaps,and that everything was fine.

[JJ Irani]

[mailman]

[C.J.]

Peter, you are a gem

[SWOS]

Bowahahahahaaahha Jejejjejejejejejjejejeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

i once had a similar experience but i was sick at the time (i was taking a computer lesson like 5 years ago) and i suddenly puked all over the monitor and the keyboard .. nobody laughed at the time..but i did when i went back home the second day i was back in class

[mike]

padi, I think I would have turned to my wife and said "Are you allright"?

[Launch Mini]

At least there was no "suprise" waiting for you

[roadcarver]

Its all part of the natural body process... I cracked one too one time at a get together with my highschool buddies. I was coughing real hard and BRPRFFPRBRRSHHHFTTT!

[padi56]

Originally Posted by mike

padi, I think I would have turned to my wife and said "Are you allright"?

Tried that one Mike,but again the look of death,and considerable tongue pie going home in the car.

But later that night revenge is sweet.

[mailman]

Originally Posted by roadcarver

Its all part of the natural body process... I cracked one too one time at a get together with my highschool buddies. I was coughing real hard and BRPRFFPRBRRSHHHFTTT!

It's totally acceptable whrn you're with the guys Vernon As a matter of fact, it's funny no matter where you rip one off. I mean I wouldn't blatantly let one go somewhere where it shouldn't be done like yoga class Farts are funny