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29 July 2020, 07:27 AM | #1 |
2024 Pledge Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Real Name: John Baker III
Location: Spring,Texas
Watch: 1971 Red Sub
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Entertainment Night at the Senior Center
It was entertainment night at the senior citizens'
center. After the community sing along led by Alice at the piano, it was time for the star of the show - Claude the Hypnotist! Claude explained that he was going to put the whole audience into a trance. "Yes, each and every one of you and all at the same time." said Claude. The excited chatter dropped to silence as Claude carefully withdrew from waistcoat pocket; a beautiful antique gold pocket watch and chain. "I want you to keep your eyes on this watch" said Claude, holding the watch high for all to see. "It is a very special and valuable watch that has been in my family for 6 generations" said Claude. He began to swing the watch gently back and forth while quietly chanting "Watch the watch --- Watch the watch ----Watch the watch" The audience became mesmerized as the watch swayed back and forth. The lights were twinkling as they were reflected from its gleaming surface. A hundred and fifty pairs of eyes followed the movements of the gently swaying watch. They were hypnotized. And then, suddenly, the chain broke!!! The beautiful watch fell to the stage and burst apart on impact! "SHIT!" said Claude. It took them three days to clean the Senior Citizens' Center - and Claude was never invited back again!!
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As I've grown older, I've learned that pleasing everyone is impossible, but pissing off everyone is a piece of cake. |
29 July 2020, 11:29 AM | #2 |
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Real Name: Clive
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29 July 2020, 11:34 AM | #3 |
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Real Name: Michael
Location: Connecticut
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Lol
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29 July 2020, 05:35 PM | #4 |
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Real Name: KP Jimmy
Location: Singapore
Watch: R/AP/FPJ/Hermès/et
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29 July 2020, 06:10 PM | #5 |
Banned
Join Date: Jul 2020
Location: USA
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hahaha
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5 August 2020, 03:43 AM | #6 |
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Real Name: Steve.
Location: UK
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Thank you...
We laughed out loud at that. |
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