ROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEX
10 June 2017, 04:46 PM | #1 |
"TRF" Life Patron
Join Date: Jun 2005
Real Name: Peter
Location: Llanfairpwllgwyng
Watch: ing you.
Posts: 52,261
|
Face lift.
A woman decides to have a face-lift for her 50th birthday. She spends £5,000 and feels pretty good about the results. On her way home, she stops at a news stand to buy a newspaper. Before leaving, she says to the clerk, "I hope you don't mind my asking, but how old do you think I am?"
"About 32," is the reply. "Nope! I'm exactly 50," the woman says happily. A little while later she goes into McDonald's and asks the counter girl the very same question. The girl replies, "I guess about 29." The woman replies, "Nope I'm 50." Now she's feeling really good about herself. She stops in a drug store on her way down the street. She goes up to the counter to get some mints and asks the clerk this burning question. The clerk responds, "Oh, I'd say 30." Again she proudly responds, "I am 50, but thank you." While waiting for the bus to go home, she asks an old man waiting next to her the same question. He replies, "Lady, I'm 78 an and my eye sight is going. Although, when I was young, there was a sure way to tell how old a woman was. It sounds very forward, but it requires you to let me put my hands under your bra. Then, and only then can I tell you EXACTLY how old you are." They wait in silence on the empty street until curiosity gets the best of her. She finally blurts out, "What the hell, go ahead." He slips both of his hands under her blouse and begins to feel around very slowly and carefully. He bounces and weighs each breast...He gently pinches each nipple. He pushes her breasts together and rubs them against each other. After a couple of minutes of this, she says, "OK, okay...How old am I?" He completes one last squeeze of her breasts, removes his hands, and says, "Madam, you are 50." Stunned and amazed, the woman says, "That was incredible, how could you tell?' The old man says, "promise you won't get mad?" "I promise I won't." she says. "I was behind you in line at McDonald's."
__________________
ICom Pro3 All posts are my own opinion and my opinion only. "The clock of life is wound but once, and no man has the power to tell just when the hands will stop. Now is the only time you actually own the time, Place no faith in time, for the clock may soon be still for ever." Good Judgement comes from experience,experience comes from Bad Judgement,.Buy quality, cry once; buy cheap, cry again and again. www.mc0yad.club Second in command CEO and left handed watch winder |
10 June 2017, 06:10 PM | #2 |
"TRF" Member
Join Date: Sep 2008
Real Name: Clive
Location: Exoplanet
Watch: spring-driven
Posts: 38,856
|
__________________
|
10 June 2017, 06:45 PM | #3 |
Banned
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Kingstown
Posts: 58,281
|
Good one.
|
11 June 2017, 09:21 AM | #4 |
"TRF" Member
Join Date: Sep 2014
Real Name: Angelo
Location: Brooklyn, NY
Watch: Rolex Submariner
Posts: 42,164
|
Haha. I'm still laughing.
__________________
Rolex Submariner Omega Seamaster Aqua Terra Tudor Black Bay 58 Blue Tudor Ranger 79910 Nomos Club Datum 733 Nomos Metro 38 Stowa Flieger Classic 40 * Card carrying member of TRF's Global Association of Retro-Grouch-Curmudgeons * |
13 June 2017, 01:33 PM | #5 |
"TRF" Member
Join Date: Apr 2012
Real Name: Alex
Location: Chicago
Watch: AP,PP, Rolex
Posts: 37,156
|
__________________
Instagram: @Hairdude Watches in Collection 5070R, 5522A, 214270 MK1, 228238 16750, 26401, 5711, 116718, 116710LN, 116300, 16710"Coke", 372, 15300, 15703 (All Flipped) Official Member "Perpetual 30" Las Vegas GTG 2016 Official Member "WIS-CON" Las Vegas International GTG 2017 Official Member 'WIS-CON' Las Vegas Int'l GTG 2018 |
14 June 2017, 02:47 PM | #6 |
2024 Pledge Member
Join Date: Jul 2009
Real Name: DrK
Location: India
Watch: 4=YMDaytonaGMTHulk
Posts: 7,047
|
Great!
|
19 June 2017, 08:44 PM | #7 |
2024 Pledge Member
Join Date: Dec 2007
Real Name: Peter
Location: Sydney
Watch: The Game
Posts: 17,407
|
|
20 June 2017, 07:04 AM | #8 |
"TRF" Member
Join Date: Jan 2009
Real Name: Jim
Location: Alpha
Posts: 3,383
|
Dang nabbit! Got me again!
|
20 June 2017, 07:09 AM | #9 |
2024 ROLEX DATEJUST41 Pledge Member
Join Date: May 2011
Real Name: Larry
Location: San Diego, CA
Watch: ROLEX
Posts: 25,206
|
__________________
✦ 28238 President DD 18K/YG ✦ 16610LN SS Sub ✦ 16613 18K/SS Serti ✦ 16550 Exp II Non-Rail Cream Dial ✦ Daytona C 116500 ✦ 126710 BLRO GMT-Master II ✦ NEXT-->? ⛳ Hole In One! 10/3/19 DMCC 5th hole, par 3, 168 yards w/ 4-Iron. |
20 June 2017, 08:14 AM | #10 |
TRF Moderator & 2024 DATE-JUST41 Patron
Join Date: Apr 2012
Real Name: Tim
Location: Pennsylvania
Watch: 14060M
Posts: 71,828
|
Good one Peter!
__________________
Rolex Submariner 14060M Omega Seamaster 2254.50 DOXA Professional 1200T Card carrying member of TRF's Global Association of Retro-Grouch-Curmudgeons TRF's "After Dark" Bar & NightClub Patron P Club Member #17 2 FA ENABLED
|
20 June 2017, 08:56 AM | #11 |
"TRF" Member
Join Date: Jul 2008
Real Name: Dr Mark R Nail
Location: New Albany
Watch: Tudor Sub 75090
Posts: 8,057
|
Cute.
__________________
------------------------------- Member of the Nylon Nation |
20 June 2017, 02:02 PM | #12 |
2024 Pledge Member
Join Date: May 2008
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 6,602
|
__________________
WG SUB-116719 GMT MASTER II 126719 |
21 June 2017, 03:10 AM | #13 |
"TRF" Member
Join Date: Sep 2016
Real Name: Michael
Location: USA
Posts: 440
|
Bill Burr has a great bit about face lifts
|
Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests) | |
|
|
*Banners
Of The Month*
This space is provided to horological resources.