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Old 17 September 2023, 07:14 AM   #1
Madman37
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Best dad jokes

Post best dad jokes here i will start

I went to a bee keeper and asked for 12 bees. He gave me 13. I said sir you gave me one extra. He said thatís a free bee.
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Old 17 September 2023, 08:02 AM   #2
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A Vick’s Vaporub truck crashed during rush hour this morning. Despite blocking multiple lanes, there was no congestion.
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Old 17 September 2023, 08:08 AM   #3
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What did one ocean say to the other ocean?
Nothing, they just waved.
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Ain't much of a crime, whacking a surly bartender
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Old 17 September 2023, 04:45 PM   #4
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Quote:
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A Vickís Vaporub truck crashed during rush hour this morning. Despite blocking multiple lanes, there was no congestion.
ha ha
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Old 17 September 2023, 04:45 PM   #5
Madman37
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What did one ocean say to the other ocean?
Nothing, they just waved.
my kid loved it
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Old 19 September 2023, 09:56 AM   #6
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What do ticks and the Eiffel Tower have in common?

They are both ParisSites
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Old 20 September 2023, 11:37 PM   #7
brandrea
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I showed my wife this thread Ö. She simply gave me an eye roll
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Old 21 September 2023, 10:09 PM   #8
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I showed my wife this thread Ö. She simply gave me an eye roll
That's the highest form of acceptance of a dad joke isn't it?
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Old 21 September 2023, 10:17 PM   #9
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That's the highest form of acceptance of a dad joke isn't it?
You know what... I think you're right!

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Old 11 October 2023, 04:59 AM   #10
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What do you call a cow with no legs?.......Ground Beef! hahahahaha!
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Old 15 October 2023, 06:19 PM   #11
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What do you call a dinosaur that has gone blind?

Idonthinkhesaurus
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Old 15 October 2023, 09:42 PM   #12
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Wife kept complaining I was horrible with directions. So I packed my bags and right.
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Old 16 October 2023, 02:58 AM   #13
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Bump!
It's a nice collection you have there

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Old 19 October 2023, 01:59 PM   #14
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Quote:
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What do you call a cow with no legs?.......Ground Beef! hahahahaha!
Where do you find a cow with no legs? Right where you left it.
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Old 21 October 2023, 07:35 AM   #15
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What is the leading cause of dry skin?

Towels
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Old 26 October 2023, 09:25 AM   #16
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There was a kidnapping at my son's school.
The teacher woke him up.
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Old 26 October 2023, 09:37 AM   #17
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What is the leading cause of dry skin?

Towels
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Old 8 November 2023, 08:37 AM   #18
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Quote:
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Wife kept complaining I was horrible with directions. So I packed my bags and right.
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Old 14 November 2023, 10:00 AM   #19
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If you see a crime at an Apple store, are you an iWitness?
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Old 16 November 2023, 05:39 AM   #20
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What is a pirate's favorite letter? (Pause for everyone to say "RRRRRRRRRRRR")

Said in my best pirate voice "AAAAARRRRRRR, you'd think that, but it's actually C"
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Old 20 November 2023, 08:01 AM   #21
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When does a regular joke become a dad joke?


When the punchline becomes apparent
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Old 21 November 2023, 11:10 PM   #22
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Bono and Edge walk into a bar
The bartender says, "Not U2 again"
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Old 23 November 2023, 01:23 AM   #23
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These are all so good thanks for posting i use them all
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Old 23 November 2023, 03:53 AM   #24
ltmgeller
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Love these
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Old 23 November 2023, 07:36 PM   #25
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When I was a kid, my dad got fired from his job as a road worker for theft.

I refused to believe he could do such a thing, but when I got home, the signs were all there.
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Old 23 November 2023, 10:31 PM   #26
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When is a door not a door? When itís ajar.


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Old 24 November 2023, 06:46 PM   #27
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What do you call a factory that makes okay products? A satisfactory.
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Old 25 November 2023, 07:01 AM   #28
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What do you call a frozen grape? A chilled vine!
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Old 25 November 2023, 02:04 PM   #29
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A man rushed to see his doctor and, in a panic, exclaimed "Doc! As you can see I shrunk to 3'6" overnight. Please help!"

The doctor calmly replied, "Don't worry, you'll just have to be a little patient."
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Time is an illusion, lunchtime doubly so
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Old Yesterday, 02:53 AM   #30
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I bought shoes from a drug dealer once. I don’t know what he laced them with but I was tripping all day.
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