Sobriety / Teetotaling

[brandrea]

Originally Posted by Star Ferry

that was the breaking point, and there were plenty of other times where the problem was me. I do agree that I have some friends I need to shed

Yes the two often go hand in hand. Very good of you to realize this as quitting often means that you’ll need to find different friends.

I wish you all the very best.

[codecow]

The longest I have quit for is 6 months.

[Langnam]

Went cold turkey nearly 2 years ago at age 54. I was a social drinker in college and thereafter, however I was drinking more often, more in general, and harder liquor, too.

It was not difficult, still have the same friends and still go out. I just enjoy a club soda and lemon on the town.

Waaaaay better!

Sometimes I think I should have done this 10 years earlier, but oh well.

I went back to a few old hobbies of mine, found new things to do and would NEVER consider a drink again.

NFW.

Teetotaling is the new black.


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[superdog]

This is a topic near and dear to my heart. I am going through it right now.

I stopped at the end of December. For 50 days. My health issues cleared up and I felt much better. I felt proud of myself too. I felt that I did not need to ever drink again.

Then I had a few on vacation. I got pretty drunk one night and hated myself the next day.

And then I stopped again, for a few weeks. Then I had a few with some friends.

Back and forth a bit. The past two weeks, I have been hitting it pretty hard.

I go out on business dinners about 3 times a week. Everyone drinks. Hard to not have a drink. Out with friends, or just a rough day. Or maybe a good day. There is always a reason to have one or two.

I almost never get drunk. I get up every morning at 5:00 and walk the dogs and then work out for 30 minutes. I have problems sleeping through the night when I have too much, so I never have a drink past 8:00 pm. It is an easy rule for me to keep. No temptations.

I genuinely don't see it as a problem. However, I really liked how I felt when I did not drink.

And the doctors, while they found no damage whatsoever from alcohol, have suggested it would be better for me to not drink.

I am an all or nothing kind of guy. I expect that in the next couple of weeks, possibly after the July 4th holiday, I will quit the sauce once again, and give myself a goal of 100 days this time.

It is a relatively tough call for me. Saved a ton of loot not drinking. Felt great mentally and physically. But as my health issues have not come back, and I really do enjoy a few drinks, I am not sure I really need to quit.

In the end, I think I will reach my goals faster as a non-drinker. It is just a challenge with all of the entertaining I do. Then again, I entertain less in the winter. So maybe I just wait until fall to slow it down. We shall see.

[Langnam]

I have many dinners with clients, in fact, two in the last two days. They drink, I stay sober, everyone is happy and I can conclude my business in a methodical, revenue producing way.

I should have done that 10 years earlier! Dang.

Medical issues? I never really had any except for a kidney stone. Once I stopped drinking, damn if EVERY ache, pain , inflammation did go away.

Reason enough right there.




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[joeychitwood]

The majority of people can enjoy alcohol without negative consequences. I wasn't one of those people. I abused any substance capable of altering my mood, and it became necessary to quit in 1987. I haven't had a drink or drug since, and I've never regretted being the guy who doesn't drink. It has never been an issue.

[rushca01]

I abstain from drinking for a couple weeks at a time to cut weight.. I love beer, especially the IPA's, I also love bourbon and red wines...

It's very difficult when at golf outings, pool parties, or even just a dinner with my family. I have an addictive personality (same problem with watches and other hobbies) which can make things difficult. Things would be ok if I was a 1 beer kind of guy...problem is once I have one I want another. So I have your classic "I don't drink during the week but binge on the weekend" which is the worst possible thing. I don't drink to get drunk but when I do I usually have a nice buzz.

[HERITAGE82]

I have an addictive personality, and I used to drink a few nights a week with friends. I am a big beer drinker and could easily polish off a 12 pack in a night without feeling like crap the next day, and I always UBERed everywhere I went so that wasn't an issue either.

However, I recently had a baby and everything changed. I still go to the brewery and outings with friends, but now I always drive. I learned that 3-4 beers is my sweet spot where I get a nice low level buzz, but I am perfectly fine to drive and go home to tend to my son.

For me having the baby taught me that I no longer had the luxury of getting hammered and passing out when I got home. Once I return from an outing wife deserves a break, and I do the night shift with the lil guy so its important for me to be coherent.

My wife never puts restrictions on me, and is very happy that I have found a way to make adjustments in my life accordingly. As I stated earlier I have a very addictive personality so I am always putting restrictions on myself have it be collecting watches or my eating/drinking habits, and it has done great things for my marriage and life.

What I am telling you through this long winded post is don't let this experience with your bone headed friend make you stop drinking, but reassess with who, when and how much you are drinking. If you are able to make the adjustment in your life then you can enjoy drinking in a manner that wont leave you feeling guilty in the morning.

Either change with the times or the times will change you

[.brian.]

Originally Posted by Star Ferry

I envy people who are able to enjoy drinking without significant issues, but I had to admit that I'm not one of those people.

There are people who shouldn't drink at all, and unfortunately I'm probably in that group

Originally Posted by dmash

I realized that anytime I drank, it was never 'enough' unless I got drunk. A couple beers with friends needed to also be accompanied by some shots or more beers for me to be content.

Originally Posted by City74

I wasn’t a drunk but drank way more then I should and didn’t want it to become a problem.

Originally Posted by superdog

This is a topic near and dear to my heart. I am going through it right now.

Originally Posted by joeychitwood

The majority of people can enjoy alcohol without negative consequences. I wasn't one of those people.

Originally Posted by rushca01

Things would be ok if I was a 1 beer kind of guy...problem is once I have one I want another. So I have your classic "I don't drink during the week but binge on the weekend" which is the worst possible thing. I don't drink to get drunk but when I do I usually have a nice buzz.

All of these apply to me right now.

I was up to 2-2.5 cases of beer a week. Usually 6-7 a night during the week, and 10-12 on Saturday and then on Sunday. It was just too much.

My problem, as others have mentioned, is that I can't just have one or two. I just keep drinking and drinking. The thing is, I am not getting blackout drunk or anything. No hangover the next morning, etc. Not missing work, or craving a beer in the morning or at lunch.

I gave myself a goal of not drinking during the week anymore, and drinking in moderation on the weekends. I am one week in right now, so we will see how this plays out.

[Blansky]

My theory is if ones friends are uncomfortable with the fact that a person doesn’t drink, you need to get new friends.

[gabrielnovar]

not drinking had so many benefits for me. Overall better feeling, not getting sick/run down. Simply amazing. Still enjoy a glass of wine or 2 on the weekends if I go out. But have no problem going 3-4 months with out drinking.

I would only drink in a social setting

[RW16610]

I don't drink at all, really. The odd beer is a rarity with me. That being said, I've found my hobbies (watches, cars, aviation) made it much easier for me to avoid being "The guy that doesn't drink" in that way. The company you keep has a lot to do with it and I hope you'll have no difficulties transitioning. Glad nobody was hurt as that could've had a totally different ending.

[Ripcode]

I only drink a few times per month. Occasionally I may tie one one, but I also have no problem having only a drink or two.

I have plenty of friends who do not drink at all. Their choice has never been an issue for me.

Your true friends stick with you. You'll figure out who, those are.

Good luck!

[OgSnowflake]

Around 2011-2012 I was going out 6/7 nights a week, pounding hard alcohol like a straight up vigilante bottle in one hand blunt in the other real dumb shit smoking cigarettes for like 3-4 months teeth lookin like ice coffee in color it was a bad look for me im a charming kid out here lookin an acting like a bum. Tossed the cigs and nightclubs n never looked back ..I just smoke weed and can honestly say 100000% way more healthier lifestyle .....so what worked for me is kinda what you did...just gotta stop and cut that out of your life and be done with it and see where it takes you. Don’t be afraid to say nah I don’t drink but thank you anyways and as time goes by you can cheat a lil a glass of champagne a gin n tonic a lil ways down the line won’t kill you in a social Environment just keep things in moderation.

[Baco Noir]

I worked in the bar business in college and had a very high tolerance based on the amount of alcohol and drugs I was consuming. When I quit, I quit alcohol and drugs for a year cold turkey just to make sure I didn't have a problem since I was a bit excessive with both at the time. I felt awkward still going out with friends and drinking water, but it was a great test of will power and proved to myself I wasn't an addict. Now I mainly drink wine with meals and occasionally enjoy some bourbon on the rocks or a beer.

[tudorbaja27]

I personally e joy the taste of good wine, good cognac etc. As with everything, it has to be done in moderation. I am still learning that but I think overall I'm doing a much better job than I was when I was younger. Feels great once in a while to wake up on a weekend morning at 7AM ready to be productive - as opposed to waking up at 11AM hungover.

Balance is key my friends.

[droptopman]

After time, you won’t miss it. You will feel better physically and emotionally.
Been sober 20+ years. Honestly it rarely come up in social activities. Most don’t even notice. I do skip some events if I know people will get trashed. Not because being around booze bothers me, but just don’t want to be around some folks when they are drunk and you’re not...

Addiction issues are mainly biological and inherited like other medical problems. Certainly environment plays a role but biology is the strongest marker. Been working in Behavioral Health most of my adult life.

Presented many times at national events on the subject. If you have any questions don’t hesitate to PM me.

I am surprised by the number of folks here that do not drink. Pretty interesting and pretty cool

[joeychitwood]

Originally Posted by Blansky

My theory is if ones friends are uncomfortable with the fact that a person doesn’t drink, you need to get new friends.

So true.

[breitlings]

completely sober for more than a year. Priorities changed. Much more in shape now, little sharper, hungrier. I have realized some of the reasons I would partake, and have seen a Dr. to get prescriptions that I can use as needed to for example relieve stress.

[Art 1]

Originally Posted by droptopman

After time, you won’t miss it. You will feel better physically and emotionally.
Been sober 20+ years. Honestly it rarely come up in social activities. Most don’t even notice. I do skip some events if I know people will get trashed. Not because being around booze bothers me, but just don’t want to be around some folks when they are drunk and you’re not...

Addiction issues are mainly biological and inherited like other medical problems. Certainly environment plays a role but biology is the strongest marker. Been working in Behavioral Health most of my adult life.

Presented many times at national events on the subject. If you have any questions don’t hesitate to PM me.

I am surprised by the number of folks here that do not drink. Pretty interesting and pretty cool

Honestly, I'm shocked by how many do. I really am.

[gettocard]

Originally Posted by Art 1

Honestly, I'm shocked by how many do. I really am.

Add another one here. If I take a look at a well stocked bar I can only tell you what Jack Daniels and Sambuca taste like as I've drank that maybe 5 times in my whole life,everything else is absolutely uknown to me. I drink 2 or 3 beers a month depending on the occasion ( lunch/dinner out or pizza delivery at home). I'm gonna be 45 next week and I've been like that for all of my life,save it for the occasional beer drunk nights in my 20ies. I thought I would start enjoy savoring some "relax" drinking as years passed by but it doesn't seems to be the case, I just don't like strong booze,period.
I've been to a Las Vegas dealers after work barbecue few years back,the guy hosting the thing was a tequila connoisseur and collector...I mean,if I had drinked one third of the quantity he was having that afternoon I would have been dead..

[Brew]

8 years for me. I no longer miss it. Cigarettes were harder.

[TheRolexKingofLV]

A glass of wine with dinner on occasion, but that's about it. Not really a drinker.

[mannyv11]

I went through a phase where I had a fair amount of booze, but nothing crazy.
Now I drink maybe once or twice a month, and it is generally a glass of wine, a beer or 2, or a small pour of bourbon.

Lol I have saved a ton of cash over the past few years since I don't purchase bourbon like I did in the past.

[Phrank]

Originally Posted by Star Ferry

Has anyone here completely given up drinking? Or tried to quit or moderate?

I've been sober about a month now. No physical withdrawal symptoms, but the psychological pull toward alcohol is strong.

Problem was, I always drank to get, if not drunk, at least buzzed. So I typically had at least three drinks, rarely stopping at one or two

The breaking point for me happened last month. I was at a nightclub in Florida with my friends. We were having fun but also trolling a bit. My buddy hit on a woman in plain sight of her boyfriend -- shortly after, he had a gun pointed at him (out of respect for international members, the weapon is not the point of the thread and won't be mentioned again).

I decided I didn't want to spend any more time surrounded by drunk people in bars or clubs.

It's hurt my social life a little bit, and some people might think of me as the "guy who doesn't drink." But I think the long term benefits will outweigh the cost. I'm hoping to make this a permanent lifestyle change, although I still drink coffee and use an e-cigarette (Juul).

Just over 5 years ago, at 49, decided that it was time to get healthy if I wanted to enjoy the next 100 years.

Quit drinking, bad food, and it was the best, easiest most rewarding thing I ever did. I liked to party like it was 1999, just for 20 years lol.

Now, I weigh the same as when I was 21, have a sparkling clean bill of health, and never had a clearer mind and more energy, was the best thing I did for my work, wallet and self.

Not drinking is like our fancy watches, no one notices but us, if people do ask, you can agree and say so what, or say you're on some meds that don't agree with booze.

I go out to bars all the time, driving is no problem, lowest bar bill ever (LOL), and you'll start to find, at least I did, by around 11pm, when the booze starts to take hold, people turn into bumbling fools anyway, and that's the time to leave for me.

Your experience with the guy with the weapon and his girlfriend, classic scenario right out of a Lynyrd Skynyrd song, "Gimme Three Steps".

"I was cutting the rug
Down at a place called The Jug
With a girl named Linda Lu
When in walked a man
With a gun in his hand
And he was looking for you know who.
He said, "Hey there fellow,
With the hair colored yellow,
What you tryin' to prove?
'Cause that's my woman there
And I'm a man who cares
And this might be all for you."

Give it at least 3 months, you're energy will ramp up, you'll feel clearer headed (alcohol is a depressant), and your mood will improve, and you'll be more effective at your job and happier all around IMO. :-)

[SearChart]

Never drank excessively, I have about 2-4 drinks total a week, spread out. Yes, I'm boring.

[colpol]

About 10 years ago woke up with worse hangover ever & said never again. Complexly ruined a whole weekend I had planned

Still enjoy 1 or 2 beers or a couple of whiskeys but that’s it. Always the designated driver if going out & stick to soft drinks. Just reached that age That been there, done it, didn’t want to do it again. Lost a couple of drinking buddies but turns out that’s all they were

[TK-710]

I may have one or two drinks in a year. Max. But I have had more years without having any. Alcohol is pretty prevalent in both military and LE culture and I have always been “that guy” that didn’t drink. I can imagine at times it may have hurt my social standing as I have heard on more than one occasion “no one trusts the guy who doesn’t drink.” But I’m ok with that. I have seen careers and, worse yet, lives ruined. For me I have never found the pros come close to outweighing the cons. That said it doesn’t bother me at all when others do and I’ve always made sure my guys know to call me 24/7 for a ride. Hell if Uber was around when I was stationed at Bragg I’d be a millionaire now.

[TheVTCGuy]

Originally Posted by JES77

I may have one or two drinks in a year. Max. But I have had more years without having any. Alcohol is pretty prevalent in both military and LE culture and I have always been “that guy” that didn’t drink. I can imagine at times it may have hurt my social standing as I have heard on more than one occasion “no one trusts the guy who doesn’t drink.” But I’m ok with that. I have seen careers and, worse yet, lives ruined. For me I have never found the pros come close to outweighing the cons. That said it doesn’t bother me at all when others do and I’ve always made sure my guys know to call me 24/7 for a ride. Hell if Uber was around when I was stationed at Bragg I’d be a millionaire now.

Know exactly how you feel Jes, this was me. Most guys in my squadron took it in stride and advantage of me being the designated driver, but some raised eyebrows; a Navy Fighter Pilot that doesn’t drink? There must be something weird about him. Granted, this was back in the 80s, I hear the culture has changed since then, and for the better.

[jhilly8982]

I've got 9 years sober this past May.

Took me about a year to feel comfortable in social situations.