Prostate Cancer

[daveathall]

I thought I would start a new thread to update after my earlier post of "I rang the bell today".

https://www.rolexforums.com/showthread.php?t=861069

I am now in stage IV Cancer, it has spread extensively to my bones, 2 of my vertebrae have partially collapsed giving me extreme pain in my back and sides, I am taking heavy pain killers to try and manage the pain, Oramorph, Tramadol, Naproxen, Diazepam and Paracetamol. I am going for Radiotherapy on my Femur and back this afternoon and am also booked in for Zoledronic Acid treatment in the very near future which is given through drip at the chemotherapy centre, after that there are other treatments to try. The cancer now is incurable and will get me. I have been referred to the palliative care team.

I am not in a good way, the pain is excruciating and doesn't allow me to do anything. One doesn't fight cancer, its to strong, to mean to beat, what one does is have a wonderful team of doctors and nurses to turn up and do the fighting for oneself, all I do is turn up for the next battle, thats the best I can do. I have heard people say that they are going to "fight the cancer with all they have got." Trust me, it is just a saying, you can't fight it, others do it for you.

I have accepted my fate and am quite calm with it, my family, not so much, their hurt, hurts me so much. Cancer doesn't just spread its hurt through ones body, it spreads its hurt through ones family and friends also, Carole, my wife is heartbroken.

I am not scared of being dead, that will come to us all, what does scare me is dying, I fear dying in pain and that is a distinct possibility. I'm not really sure how long I have got left.

I am very tired and even the most simple of tasks exhausts me, I sleep a lot of the time. When I am awake, I get enjoyment through watching a lot of sport, (not Leeds United, they are shameful). The Indian (IPL) Premier cricket competition is fabulous, as was the snooker. I also enjoy reading the comments on TRF, I am a brash Yorkshireman and says it how I see it, so, to all those I have annoyed, let me say I am sorry.

This illness kills more men than any other, please, please, please, check your PSA every chance you get.

[White Collar Boy]

Dave, I’m so sorry. This is terrible news. I hope your pain can be effectively treated and that the cancer can somehow be stalled. Poor Carole and your kids too. You have always been one of my favourite people since I joined TRF, and I’m really, genuinely upset reading this.

You were so kind to me privately when my dad was going through his cancer treatment, and I’ll always remember that. You are one of the best gentlemen I’ve met anywhere. Please take care. Thinking of you and Carole.

[TNT009]

Damn... Went through something similar with Wife's brain cancer! Stay strong, fight and create memories!

[Spectre38]

Dave,
I am sorry to hear this. As you know, I had surgery for my Prostate Cancer in November. I can only send you my thoughts and prayers although I wish I could do more. I hope you can find something to alleviate the pain.

My very best wishes.

[Andad]

So sad to read this Dave and there is so little to say that will help you.

Hope you carers can find you some relief from the pain.

All the best from your friends in Oz.

Eddie.

[minute_man]

Dave, I'm so terribly sorry to hear. And while it's hard to pick the proper words, may I sincerely wish you and your family the best. We are all here, sir.

[brandrea]

Dave, I’m very sorry to hear this.

I hope you have a chance to see all of your family and your friends before your time. I also hope your team of doctors can make you as comfortable as possible.

My thoughts go out to you Dave. My father had prostate cancer, my uncle and grandpa died with it. I take your advice and I have a PSA test done yearly.

We love you hear my friend, you’re one of the good ones. Post as often or as little as you like.

Thoughts and prayers go out to you and Carol.

[padi56]

Dave very sorry but keep your chin up, myself in poor health been having a battle with cancer over the past few years, I beat it once but now its come back stage 3. In a lot pain like you even morphine don't help a lot now, when I wake up each morning I say to myself I am still alive, the most precious thing we have is life ,so I try to stay positive.

[winst]

So sorry to hear Dave, I hope the treatment you are receiving helps as much as it can for now.

[superdog]

Dave. I’m in tears right now.

I’m angry.

I was so happy when you rang the bell. I’m furious that you are now here. I’m sorry you are going through this. I’m sorry you need to watch your family, watch you.

But you are right. Death claims us all. It’s the one thing we all truly have in common.

You have been given the gift of life. But that gift is only temporary. What’s more, the people in your life were given the gift of you.

I realize I only know you virtually. And I’m quite literally crying for a man I never met. But you have profoundly effected me as a person. And I’m grateful. I also think your family and loved ones are extremely lucky to have had you in their lives.

You are a great person. I wish you as much peace and ease through this process.

I wish I had the words to make you better. To take Carole’s pain away.

I’m not going to suggest you fight. I’m going to suggest you surrender. Not for today or even tomorrow. I hope with all my being that this abates and you have years to live.

But I find surrendering can give peace in a way that nothing else can. Nothing besides an absolute end is certain. The coming days months and years are possibly before you.

I pray you face them with peace. Knowing you are a great person and have truly blessed this world.

[huncho]

so sorry to hear this and can't even imagine what it must feel like. hopefully there is some way to bring down the pain a bit to at least give you some peace

[TRS1]

I am so sorry to hear you and your family are going through such pain. I’ve just started to read and think a lot about this myself.

[Knappo 1307]

Dave you truly are one of the best people on TRF, I enjoy your insight and smile at many of your posts. I wish upon you and your family peace, calm, and strength.

[Dan Pierce]

This is not the news I wanted to hear from you, Dave, or Peter. Words seem so inadequate and my ability to express something, anything, that might give you both any kind of relief is an effort in futility. All I can do is express my heartfelt appreciation for you both.

Dave, you have been generous to me and everyone on TRF with your kindness and positive spirit. Many years ago you surprised me w/ a beautiful French made cigar cutter. I was touched you would think of me but then again not too surprising. While we've never met in person I've always considered you a good friend & somehow knew you felt the same.

Peter,
Can't help but love your "keep the focus on what's important" prospective on our existence. The sheer volume of horological knowledge you've provided on TRF is immense. Some didn't [don't] like your delivery. Reminds me of a few conversations w/ my dad that I didn't want to hear, but definitely needed to hear.

Wish y'all peace & serenity to you & your families. All I have to offer is my love, admiration, & appreciation.
dP

[RRGHOST1]

So sorry Dave, my wife died four years ago from secondries to breast cancer, brain cancer, bone,and liver cancer. Difficult times i know.

[joeychitwood]

I’m so sorry that you and your family are suffering like this. Though I don’t know you in a traditional sense, I’ve come to know some of your your thoughts and personality traits through this forum, and you’re one of the good guys. Having faced a 50/50 chance of dying twice in the last six years, I know the thoughts and feelings you have at 3 AM, and I hope for peace and comfort for you.

[SDGT3]

Dave,

I’m so sorry to hear this news as I was just thinking about you yesterday and how there hasn’t been a recent post. Thoughts and prayers to you and the family.

[RichM]

So sorry to hear this news. Dave and Peter, you will both be in our prayers. Try to stay strong.

Just remember, we are here for you.

[Colorado_kid]

My goodness, I’m so sorry to hear this news. I can only imagine what you and your family are going through. It has gripped my morning reading this thread and your previous thread.

Thank you for the suggestions to take regular PSA tests.

I haven’t had one yet. What age is typically recommended?

I just turned 41 last week.

My father, grandfather, and an uncle have had prostate cancer.

Is the PSA something to do annually?


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[GolfJunkie]

Dave, I'm so sorry to hear this. This is the first post I read this morning and it has me in tears.

I can't say I know what you're going through but it brings back so many memories of when my mom was diagnosed with stage IV brain cancer.

I wish you all the best and hope you and your family can find some sort of comfort and enjoy your time together.

[Dynamite_Kid19]

I am very sorry to hear how hard this is for you and those closest to you. It seems you have a lot of people here and in your life that love you. I wish you and everyone you love and who loves you all the comfort and peace in the world.

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[airchitect]

So sorry to hear this Dave. I’ve been on the other side of this, giving care and watching. I know it’s hard though I still can’t say I know what it’s like. All I can say to you is to try to enjoy the moments. Tell those around you everything you’ve ever wanted. If you can, write notes and letters that people may be able to read on future milestones in their lives. Record your voice so that they can remember and those you never meet can know how you were. Tie up the loose ends.
I hate that this is your reality, but if at all possible try to look at it as an opportunity to do the things many are unable to do before they go. I wish you and your family all the best and am praying for you.


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[WatchEater666]

Thank you for taking the time to write this up and make a post here. Means a lot with what you are going through - and thinking of others at a time like this. Is there a favorite charity of yours we can contribute to?

[BLACKHORSE 6]

Dave,

So sorry to read this. I've always enjoyed your posts.

I remember that you were in the army, and that you were a grunt infantryman. As I read your words, I could see the same courage that I saw in others during difficult times while in uniform. A clear understanding of what is to come, not shrinking away from it... just preparation and a hope that things turn out as well as they can. I pray that you can face this with all the grace and dignity that you can muster, and that your family can have some measure of peace.

Wishing you all the best,
David

[Tools]

Thanks for giving us an update Dave.

Too often we forget that the Forum is made up of individuals, and have no sense of what goes on with each of us. We're with you.

[fmc000]

I have no words.

[herts9]

Very sorry to hear the news Dave. Cancer is an indiscriminate bitch of a thing. It doesn't care about feelings, or disposition or age, or plans..

It's bad enough it affects you in the way that it does, physically and mentally. But the part that scares the hell out of me is how it affects those that we eventually have to leave behind on this earth. My fight at that point would TRY to push pain management off and reassure loved ones. I can't even imagine. Stay strong, my friend. Thoughts and prayers out to you and your family.

[GB-man]

I am very sad to hear this Dave. I look forward to your posts they are always thoughtful and gentlemanly. Time is fleeing us all isn't it. I hope you find peace and some joy here and there my friend.

[Blansky]

I'm really sorry Dave. So sorry.

Not sure what to say other than I hope they can manage the pain for you.

You're one of my favorites. A great person.

[JasoninDenver]

I am so sorry that you have to walk this road. I admire your attitude towards dealing with what now lays before you. I wish the best for your family.