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Gedanken · 21 August 2005, 05:06 PM

A Welsh man buys several sheep, hoping to breed them for wool.

After several weeks, he notices that none of the sheep are getting pregnant, and phones a vet for help. The vet tells him that he should try artificial insemination.

The farmer doesn't have the slightest idea what this means but, not wanting to display his ignorance, only asks the vet how he will know when the sheep are pregnant. The vet tells him that they will stop standing around and instead will lie down and wallow in grass when they are pregnant.

The man hangs up and gives it some thought. He comes to the conclusion that artificial insemination means he has to impregnate the sheep himself.

So, he loads the sheep into his Land Rover, drives them out into the woods, has sex with them all, brings them back, and goes to bed. Next morning, he wakes and looks out at the sheep.

Seeing that they are all still standing around, he deduces that the first try didn't take, and loads them in the Land Rover again. He drives them out to the woods, bangs each sheep twice for good measure, brings them back, and goes to bed exhausted. The next morning, he wakes to find the sheep still just standing round.

"Try again." he tells himself, and proceeds to load them up, and drive them out to the woods. He spends all day shagging the sheep and upon returning home, falls listlessly into bed.

The next morning, he cannot even raise himself from the bed to look out of the window. He asks his wife to look, and tell him if the sheep are lying in the grass.

"No," she says, "they're all in the Land Rover, and one of them is beeping the horn."

JJ Irani · 21 August 2005, 05:25 PM

LMAO!! Good one!!

padi56 · 21 August 2005, 07:44 PM

Yes thats one of my favourites,but on very very careful research.Found out that
he was a Kiwi farmer who emigrated to Wales.

AJC · 21 August 2005, 07:56 PM

Anyone who has that much respect for sheep must be a kiwi.

padi56 · 21 August 2005, 08:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AJC

Anyone who has that much respect for sheep must be a kiwi.

JJ Irani · 22 August 2005, 04:38 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AJC

Anyone who has that much respect for sheep must be a kiwi.

Aaron,
I henceforth place you in the top three tosser category!!

Rockrolex · 22 August 2005, 06:42 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JJ Irani

Aaron,
I henceforth place you in the top three tosser category!!

JJ, at last count, I think there were about 10 people in the top three tosser category.

Gedanken · 22 August 2005, 08:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rockrolex

JJ, at last count, I think there were about 10 people in the top three tosser category.

Well, if one has had experience cramming ten sheep in a Land Rover built for three, this shouldn't be an issue.

Rockrolex · 22 August 2005, 09:59 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gedanken

Well, if one has had experience cramming ten sheep in a Land Rover built for three, this shouldn't be an issue.

LMAO!!

21 August 2005, 05:06 PM	#1
Gedanken "TRF" Member Join Date: May 2005 Real Name: Sir Location: Melbourne Watch: F-series SD Posts: 8,589	Welsh farmer A Welsh man buys several sheep, hoping to breed them for wool. After several weeks, he notices that none of the sheep are getting pregnant, and phones a vet for help. The vet tells him that he should try artificial insemination. The farmer doesn't have the slightest idea what this means but, not wanting to display his ignorance, only asks the vet how he will know when the sheep are pregnant. The vet tells him that they will stop standing around and instead will lie down and wallow in grass when they are pregnant. The man hangs up and gives it some thought. He comes to the conclusion that artificial insemination means he has to impregnate the sheep himself. So, he loads the sheep into his Land Rover, drives them out into the woods, has sex with them all, brings them back, and goes to bed. Next morning, he wakes and looks out at the sheep. Seeing that they are all still standing around, he deduces that the first try didn't take, and loads them in the Land Rover again. He drives them out to the woods, bangs each sheep twice for good measure, brings them back, and goes to bed exhausted. The next morning, he wakes to find the sheep still just standing round. "Try again." he tells himself, and proceeds to load them up, and drive them out to the woods. He spends all day shagging the sheep and upon returning home, falls listlessly into bed. The next morning, he cannot even raise himself from the bed to look out of the window. He asks his wife to look, and tell him if the sheep are lying in the grass. "No," she says, "they're all in the Land Rover, and one of them is beeping the horn." __________________ You buy a Casio to make sure you're on time; you wear a Rolex because you don't have to be on time.

21 August 2005, 05:25 PM	#2
JJ Irani Fondly Remembered Join Date: May 2005 Real Name: JJ Location: Auckland, NZ Watch: ALL SOLD!! Posts: 74,320	LMAO!! Good one!! __________________ Words fail me in expressing my utmost thanks to ALL of you for this wonderful support during my hour of need!! I firmly believe that my time on planet earth is NOT yet up!! I shall fight this to the very end.......and WIN!!

21 August 2005, 07:44 PM	#3
padi56 "TRF" Life Patron Join Date: Jun 2005 Real Name: Peter Location: Llanfairpwllgwyng Watch: ing you. Posts: 52,225	Yes thats one of my favourites,but on very very careful research.Found out that he was a Kiwi farmer who emigrated to Wales. __________________ ICom Pro3 All posts are my own opinion and my opinion only. "The clock of life is wound but once, and no man has the power to tell just when the hands will stop. Now is the only time you actually own the time, Place no faith in time, for the clock may soon be still for ever." Good Judgement comes from experience,experience comes from Bad Judgement,.Buy quality, cry once; buy cheap, cry again and again. www.mc0yad.club Second in command CEO and left handed watch winder

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21 August 2005, 07:56 PM	#4
AJC "TRF" Member Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Australia Posts: 1,878	Anyone who has that much respect for sheep must be a kiwi.

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