The Household Domestic Fridge.

[padi56]

At some stage over the weekend something, I know not what, crawled into my fridge and died, as a result I have just cleaned it out. Cleaning a fridge is not rocket science and so my thoughts wandered. It occurred to me that there is an art to using a fridge.

Before fridges were invented, people had to eat things fast before they went off. But as there weren't any 'best before' dates, the only rule was was that you had to eat something before something airborne or bacteriological started eating it for you.

There are certain things that live permanently in the fridge, for the whole of the lifetime of the fridge. Among these are a half used tube of tomato puree, a bottle of lemon juice and an old hard boiled egg.. There is also a bottle of ointment, with a sticky lid and label, for a medicinal purpose, so private that no one wants to mention it.

Some people can go to the fridge and rustle up a three course meal made entirely of leftovers. The question should be asked, if they are such great cooks, why do they have so many leftovers?

The fridge is the natural home for milk. In fact if there is only one thing in the fridge, it is going to be milk. That is because a house without milk is a house incapable of making tea or coffee and therefore to all intents and purposes a dead house. that is why the top priority when you return from a holiday is to get some milk in the fridge.

Most fridges have little drawers for the salad things to go in. This very conveniently hides your salad so that you can forget all about it until it is time to throw it away.

In many houses the fridge serves as a communal noticeboard. With messages on the door in magnetic letters are always somewhat contrived, as you never have quite enough vowels, to say exactly what you want to say. Messages on the inside are more often along the lines of ' I have measured the exact angle of this slice of chocolate cake. Shaving bits off will result in your slow and painful death by disembowelment.'

Philosophers have often speculated whether the fridge light is still on when the door is closed, in return fridges often speculate whether philosophers still talk sh!te when they take their corduroy jackets off!

For a piece of food being put in the freezer compartment is like being a CV that's put on file. Technically, you could be used, but in reality you have been forgotten. Of course some foods live in the freezer, ice-cream can survive for years in there, or up to two hours if there is a woman or kids in the house.

Defrosting the freezer should be done every three to six months but in reality happens as often as the passing of.Well an ice-age. If you find a woolly Mammoth or a Sabre Toothed Tiger in your drip tray you have probably left it too long.

[Otis]

So very true!
The fridge is also the embodiment of the phrase 'the best laid plains go to waste'

[padi56]

I Think Otis in most households today the humble fridge is just taken for granted.And expect quite a few have something lurking in the back, that well past there sell by date.

[Otis]

Originally Posted by padi56

I Think Otis in most households today the humble fridge is just taken for granted.And expect quite a few have something lurking in the back, that well past there sell by date.

Yes, I know I've been guilty of that before.